Easy Breezy

I never hesitate to complain about the difficulties associated with adoption, much to my shame. But today I am happy to report that something went easily! Our home study will be updated this month and in anticipation we have to have updated forms. Nolan had not had his yearly physical so I scheduled it for yesterday, Halloween. Per the nurses at the office, it was a great day to be there because no one else was! We met our pediatrician at 1:30, Nolan's physical was completed and our MD completed both boys' medical reports. When we got ready to leave at 2:00 (yes, that's right- 30 minutes folks- in and out) I stopped with the boys to praise God for something easy!!!

Anything

It's time to update our home study. I had so successfully blocked out all the paperwork mess that ruled my time for so long that I was genuinely surprised to see it resurface after so many months. I didn't even recognize it. Paperwork, I did not miss you. 

In July of 2011 we were told by fellow adopting parents that the USCIS office in Nashville allowed people to walk in at any time once their appointment was scheduled. And how wonderful it was! We went as soon as we were able, very grateful to actually get something done sooner than expected. So imagine our surprise yesterday when we arrived one day early for our second appointment to be told walk-ins were not allowed. The office is only allowed so many fingerprints a day and if "I do it for you I have to do it for everyone." I wonder why the government has the reputation of being less than efficient and accommodating...

So today we will take the boys out of school early and make the trip again. To have fingerprints taken of our same fingers.

Of course my reaction was to be TICKED by our wasted morning and tank of gas (at $3.69/ gallon I might add). I ranted to David about how ridiculous this whole process is...how wasteful...how tiring...how old it is getting. Why does all of it have to be a burden? Where is the joy? Can't others see that we are trying to have a child here? Where is the empathy? Why in the world does the FBI need two sets of fingerprints? Couldn't they check the first prints again?

Being a perpetual expectant mother has started to lose it's charm, in case I was unclear.

And then God shows himself, just like He does every-single-time. On the radio today I heard an interview with an adoptive mom who prayed "anything God" for her family. Her anything is now her son who was born in Rwanda. She talked about waiting and hurting and bonding. And her prayer was I will do anything for you God. And I felt that familiar, inaudible whisper speaking right inside me...Anything Erin. You know you would do anything for Nolan. Anything for Thomas. Anything for your girl. Anything. 

Home studies.

Blood draws.

Bank records.

Background checks.

Applications.

Employment forms.

Copies of everything.

Fingerprints.

Confidentiality disclosures.

Vaccination records for the dog.
Home visits.

Pictures.

Letters of recommendation.

Notary public seals.

Apostilles.

Money.
Waiting.

God adopted me. He did anything for me. He did everything for me- he gave it all up. For me. He continues to pursue me, woo me,  chastise me, free me, love me. 

Anything.

So today we will go back to Nashville. I will not complain. We will take the pretty day God gave us and we will do anything for our girl today. 

Adoption Bug Tees

We are excited to be associated with Show Hope, a fabulous organization here in Tennessee that has done so much for orphan care. Adoption Bug has partnered with Show Hope to help families raise money for adoption. If you buy a shirt, a portion of the proceeds will be used toward our adoption & travel expenses. If you would like to purchase a shirt, you can click on the link to the right of my blog, choose "Fundraiser Tees", click on "Family Fundraisers" and then look for the Robertson Family. Not only will you benefit our family but when you wear your shirt, you will bring attention to orphan care. Thank you so much!

Sweet spot

So I guess this time in life is called the sweet spot. I have my little ones at home with me. They are ages that I consider almost perfect. Big enough to go potty alone but not too big to fit in my lap. They like to hold my hand. They want me to read books at night. They don't get mad when I wake them up by singing "rise and shine" (although I'm pretty sure that's coming, right Mom?). They usually let me pick out their clothes. When they are hurt they cry for me. They think I am smart and my answers to life's questions are sufficient. I know I'm going to miss this.

And I have my parents close by. They are well (praise God for my dad's health). They are such a part of our lives that I can't even believe we lived 550 miles apart for so many years. How did we manage? I can't imagine not being able to get to them in 25 minutes. We would be so lonely.

I am a blessed Mom. The boys gave me the first wave of gifts on Thursday- they couldn't wait. A hand painted wild rose from Nolan and a #1 Mom key chain made with T's own chubby hands. I can't imagine better gifts.This morning David made breakfast and the boys ushered me into the kitchen (Thomas bowed as I entered...he is so funny). More gifts arrived during the day- a bookmark and poem Nolan made in school, a puzzle he decorated for me in Sunday school and flower pots Nana helped the boys decorate. We had lunch with Ryan & Jen & kids at Nana & Bopa's after church. It was delicious despite the blackened vegetable kabobs. I think they added to the festive mood. I wore my grandmother's rings today and told the boys about them. David got his grandmother's pistol out of the safe to show the boys which I thought was hilarious. This is our family---some families have jewelry heirlooms, others have weapons...We have both.

And I hope next year is a repeat of this year. Except I pray that a little girl will join us.

Spring has sprung

Spring has sprung...I think it's safe to say. Even though the calendar says it's not official, closets have been changed and critters have been caught. Exhibit #1(Saturday):

The box turtle was an exciting find. We have also spotted lizards & lots of bugs and T caught a toad. I am wise enough to ask what I am being called to see when I hear "Mama! Come look!" as I cannot stand a snake. A few nights ago I had to get Nolan out of bed to listen to the owls hoot with me. They sounded like they were on our deck. 

Exhibit #2 happened today:

An eagle nesting along Richland Creek.

And my flowers are blooming. 

In March. 

So are the dogwoods and red buds, two of my favorite trees.

Along with spring comes the glorious time change. I no longer want to have dinner at 5 pm and put the boys to bed by 6:30. Clothes dry outside on the line, windows wide open- I love it. For a while I secretly enjoy the air of laziness that winter brings with short days and yucky weather. And even though winter didn't make much of a showing this year spring is such a welcome change.

Tree of life

I haven't posted anything in so long because things haven't looked so good- and having to write it was more than I could stand. But today God showed himself so sweet to us again. We are ON THE LIST!!! That's right- our dossier has been officially registered with the Honduran government and we, the Robertsons, are on THE LIST! I got an email from our agency this morning as I was searching for tax information (blah) and I got so dizzy I almost fell out of my chair! Just yesterday a friend asked how things were going. I told him not so good...nothing appeared to be happening for anyone and that if God didn't do something big nothing was going to happen anytime soon. And then last night our life group prayed for our adoption. And today we are on the list.

Being registered is huge- I was so worried that our psych evals or medical reports or something else would have to be redone and it made my heart sink. I hated the thought of wasted time, doctors appointments where we have weird tests done, more notaries & apostilles. I know, I know, I know...we still have a long road ahead and things can change on a dime (I'm saying this to myself), but today we celebrate.

It has been a stressful few months of waiting. Somehow waiting with nothing to do towards our adoption is harder than having too many things to do. Other families we have grown to care for have decided to adopt from other countries, and my heart has been heavy as they have had so many hard decisions to make. Another family we know met their infant son in Russia months ago and have been waiting on a court date so they could go back for him, knowing he is changing every day and they are missing it. God has made me tender towards them and the children that wait for them.

Our boys talk about their sister like they know her. On Christmas eve, as I put Thomas to bed, he said "maybe Baby Sister will be here in the morning!" I didn't know if I should laugh with joy or cry with the reality of it. Nolan wrote a letter last week at school and said he couldn't wait for her to come to school with him. Thomas put his Valentine money from Nana & Bopa in our Baby Sister jar.

So today I am thankful to God who shows himself so mighty and I learn again that he cares about the details of  life. I am thankful to my friends and family who are praying our girl home. And I am thankful for the couple  dozen people who graciously read my texts in the middle of their day and celebrated with us!

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12 

Hope

I buy a new ornament each  year for the boys. I try to choose one that reflects something special about the year or something they enjoy at the time. While I was shopping this little gingerbread girl caught my eye. I smiled at her and then walked away. I had never bought anything for our daughter and hadn't planned to until we get her picture. I'm not sure why the picture has been my line in the sand, but it was. And then I thought that maybe it is okay to buy one thing, some little ornament so that someday she will know that in 2011 we thought about her everyday, we prayed for her everyday, we waited and hoped for her everyday.